What a life.

I mean, I don't think anyone has so many issues and insecurities as I do. I just wish I could get over myself sometimes, and not wallow so much in self-pity. It's pathetic, really. I know that I can do anything I set my mind to. There is so much of life that I still want to see, so many people that I still want to meet. Sometimes I feel as though my friends fail to see how scared I am and how much reassurance I need. Then, I snap back to reality and realise that I shouldn't be relying on other people's assurances.
I suppose its because I am an incredibly self-absorbed and vain drama Queen. Maby I'm being too hard on myself. Nobody asks me how I really am anymore. It's not that they don't care, I just don't think they are really interested. Maybe I just miss my Therapist, who used to listen to me go on like this for hours...
Somethimes I even get jealous of some of my friends. What a terrible thing to be envious of those you love! Am I making a mountain of a molehill? Has the Queen finally flipped her lid? Well, I think its just the stress of almost turning 25. On the 23rd of July. The countdown has officially begun and I'm getting a little nervous. I'm not about to go into another self-doubt session, I know that I'm going to be fine. It just helps to know that people love spending time with me, that I too have something to offer in the way of excitement! Am I boring? It's true that I have retreated a bit into myself in the last couple of months. Do people find it tiring to be with me? Don't they know that I just need some encouragement? Don't they want me to stay? I'm always leaving. Maybe someone should give me a reason to stay! Umm, ok, I think I've gone far enough. I like myself very much! I guess it would be nice if people showed me that they like me too, instead of .. well.. oh never mind! I have lost it after all.
At least I'm throwing the biggest birthday bash ever! I intend to go into maturity with a bang that will make the Earth resonate for months to come!